Just a bit of insight...
By Lyndsey ercanbrack

The other night Tom made a comment to me about my desire (or lack thereof) to share my time with others and be social. I wanted to debate and give all my reasons why his allegation was absolutely absurd, but I could not come up with anything. Surprised that I had nothing to say? (That was rhetorical but feel free to tell me if you want to.) He pointed out to me that I have a tendency to draw people into my life and then feel with writhing pain, the consequences because they want to be in my life... i.e. visiting, phone calls and "hanging out". He explained, very gently mind you, I have the ability to be very friendly, but I am not capable of the commitment that comes with being friends. I thought about it for a while and the truth is... he is spot on. I am quite the hermetical girl that he described. It is true, when someone comes to my door, I rarely answer it. I don't like having to entertain, trying to come up with congenial conversation is like work to me. Play dates have never been my style and plans made with me are often times broken. Oh... and just so you know, the "drop ins" nearly kill me. I find that I am perfectly happy living in my own little world and I rarely invite people in to get to know the real me. So, why am I composing this condemning little chapter of my life in my blog... Especially when I am sure all of you have already figured this out about me? (Dang it, I'm always the last to know!) My reasoning is I have been enlightened by my very wise husband. I have never taken the time to realize, this one is on me. I am definitely aware that I have the best group of girlfriends in the world. You guys are patient, loving, funny and always so supportive. No matter what mess I manage to get myself into, you love unconditionally. So my point is don't give up on me, I have great examples to learn from and I will get this... I promise.

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