Movies for Schmucks

By Lyndsey Ercanbrack
Well, the blistering heat and relentless sun tell me that it is definitely summer...and If I had any doubts, being exposed to way too much skin on both the male and female body, removes all question. At what point did anyone think we wanted to see the people of Wal Mart, outside of Wal Mart? It is almost as though summer gives us the right to dress like a bunch of squalid inhabitants...moving on. The title to this featured spiel gives away any hope that this is a fashion article. And before I allow this post  to be hijacked by a set of strong clothing (or lack thereof) opinions, (We will cover why I don't particularly love the sloppy, scantily clad, in shape and out of shape summer bod's another time. I know what you are thinking... and no, I am not a Quaker– I just prefer to see people wearing clothes.)  Let me get back to the point at hand.

Back when my parents were kids... Nope...Since I was little...uh uh... I once thought I was destined for Hollywood...wrong topic...When I was of an appropriate age to appreciate a well made movie, I would look so forward to summer releases. Sitting in a theater with my treats witnessing the magic of creativity. In fact, apart from Christmas, the summer months provided the best cinema entertainment... So I am befuddled by what happened this year?

Barring Inception, which was kinda brilliant, we have suffered a scarcity of good filmage. (Don't google that word, I made it up.) Sure we have had a few fun movies...The Other Guys made me laugh here and there, Who doesn't love that Mark Wahlberg? Oh yeah, and Will Ferrell was good too. Another one,  Scott Pilgrim Takes on the World. That was quite clever. I have to say that I really enjoyed it. A bit of a college movie though...I  have a feeling it will gain a cult following. Plus, George Michael (Some know him as Michael Cera) has a gift to make  any  character he plays endearing, thus making the movie even more enjoyable to watch. And... that's about it. Wait, I can't forget The Expendables. Tom smiles from ear to ear every time the preview comes on, so we will be watching that one, are we expecting greatness? Maybe...Jason Statham is in it.

In case We have any twelve year old girls reading my blog, I won't voice my opinions on Letters to Juliet, When in Rome, Going the Distance...or anything with Katherine Heigl, Kristin Bell or anyone from week night television. ( I know what you are thinking... and no, I don't think they are the same movie... Although, since I didn't see them I can't be too sure.) 

There is one movie that I have been dying to see and  I already feel connected to the cast.
side story

People have been telling my oldest sister for years that she is a dead wringer for Annette Bening. And  since Boogie Nights release  I have been told I resemble Julianne Moore... (I have my moments) AND my older brother doesn't necessarily look like, but behaves exactly the same as Mark Ruffalo. (I have had the pleasure of talking with him) So of course I am going to want to see a movie with all three of them starring in it... Even if it the two women that resemble my sister and I are lesbian lovers, and their sperm donor just happens to behave exactly  as my brother does...  I can look past that... I hope.



Oh, the title is The kids are Alright. That's the one I have been really excited to see, it received major buzz at Sundance film fest. Since then, it has been on my short list... and IF (that's a big if) I didn't live in the county that I live in, I would have already seen it. However, 95 percent of the movies I want to watch aren't ever released in my city...OR county...Or sometimes, even my state.   I actually find it very bothersome. There are plenty of people in the area that are capable of watching and even loving something other than Eat Pray Love (seriously, Julia Roberts, seriously) No, I didn't see it...  Nor  did I see that deficient flick called Dinner for Schmucks. Dear Steve Carell, maybe John Stewart will take you back and you can find yourself again. And...would I watch ever watch something with Paul Rudd? No thanks, I just showered.

Last on the agenda for tonight, is a movie that is causing a bit of a quandary. I believe it is titled The Switch. It stars Jennifer Aniston. From past posts, or any conversation you may have had with me, you know how I feel about her. So it's off the table. Not so fast...it also stars Jason Bateman. Now my first reaction was to call SNL and beg Lorn Michaels for a "Really Jason Bateman, Really?" with Seth Meyers and Amy Poehler, but unfortunately, I don't have that kind of clout. Plus, apart from me, I think a lot of people will  see the movie because she is in it. So, Jason may be doing it to help his career (did he sell out???)I don't think I will be seeing it, I just won't be able to get passed Rachel Greene and the "friends"acting coach, she still obviously uses. Sorry Jason, because of that girl, I you blew it with this girl.


One last thing... I have to admit, I saw Step Up 3. I know. It was a girls night, and no one else wanted to watch American Grindhouse. I took one for the team... I did leave all sharp objects in the car, a preventative measure I took to keep from stabbing myself in the eye. But in all honesty, I smiled through most of it. Of course the story was probably written by a thirteen year old girl, but it was fun to watch the bang up dancing. And, I was sitting next to a girl who was a huge fan, so she made it quite entertaining as well.

So in short,
(clearly too late)

I am hoping to see more creative, inventive filmage and less nakedness on the streets of Utah. And if you are with good friends, sometimes really cheesy movies can be entertaining. 

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