Tales from the UC

2b or not 2b
Please don't let it be a question. 
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I  received an email from a forty something co-worker tonight. Do you want to know what was in the subject line?

I can't wait for you to guess...I'll just tell you. (Take a second to prepare yourself...)

"OMG"

YOU.HAVE.GOT.TO.BE.KIDDING.ME. REALLY?
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This email has forced me to ask a lot of awkward and grievous questions I shouldn't have to ask myself. For example:

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1. Can I consider this a safe work environment?

2. Will I ever go through a mid life crisis and behave as though I were 13 years old?

3. Is technology (use of texting and internet chat rooms) forcing us back to neanderthalism?

4. Why am I working here?
5. Although I don't know this woman from Adam,  how can I save her from any further embarrassment?

6. Is the English language dying?

7. And last, tell me one more time why I work here?

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Why am I so down on "OMG" and any other chat room/texting acronyms? Well, besides the fact that it is very near physically painful to my eyes, I  resent it. It's lazy and lame and it's leaking into our everyday lives. I can't seem to go one day without seeing, or worse yet, hearing these irritatingly wretched words... Which, mind you, ARE NOT WORDS. Rather gibberish for young  girls and the feeble minded. Fine, if they are ten years old and are just getting into the world of texting and chatting (please bless there aren't any ten year olds out there "chatting") then fine, I get it. Hopefully it's just a stage of trying to find themselves, finding their voices... and when they realize no one is responding to them because we don't know what they are saying, they will stop this crazy vernacular and just  take  twenty more seconds out of their day to spell the full word. And for those adults that support their children in this behavior by purchasing comforter sets that  are decorated in "OMG, TTFN, GR8, LOL, IDK, BRB," and the like, I make a plea to you... Stop contributing to this rampantly horrifying communication (or lack thereof) madness!!! You are going to ruin your children's language and spelling habits and any chance of decent communication skills. I have a sneaking suspicion the local English teacher will not accept the answer  "IDK" on an essay question.

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 I am now going to say something that I know will offend many people, but just know, I am saying this out of pure love and concern. (The fact that I can't take it anymore is a menial side issue.) Please keep in mind, I am not a linguist, pedagogue or even much of a language loyalist. I am more just a girl who has had enough and can take it no longer. 

Quite Possibly the most irritating piece of chat room/texting vernacular in existence is LOL. Worse forms being LMAO, ROTFL or LOLZ. Although it is mostly used by teenage girls in  chat rooms or on their Facebook status, I am sad to report I have seen many grown adults referring to their emotional state with this depressing form of communication.  So, I say to them- Speak proper, or STFU, NOOB. (Too harsh?)

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So, Till we meet again.

TTYL